[ SECRET POST #3350 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3350 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


__________________________________________________



02.


__________________________________________________



03.


__________________________________________________



04.


__________________________________________________



05.


__________________________________________________



06.


__________________________________________________



07.


__________________________________________________



08.


__________________________________________________



09.











Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 050 secrets from Secret Submission Post #479.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

Official advertise your fandom-related event thread.

RULES FOR THIS:
1. NO images bigger than 600x600 in either direction (banners, et cetera).
2. ONE POST PER USER under this thread.
3. What IS allowed: roleplay advertisements, fandom comms, fandom events, things like that.
4. What is NOT allowed: anything for profit, any kind of fic/art commissions, seeking 1-on-1 RP, that kind of thing.

[fscom]

Official clickables thread.

RULES FOR THIS:
1. NO huge images or columns of images that require scrolling, please.
2. ONE POST PER USER under in this thread.
3. If you're going to post, try to at least help the others.

[fscom]

General comments:

(If the thread contains spoilery/triggery content please post as 2nd comment so it collapses!)

Mourning

[(Anonymous)]

It looks like my grandmother only has a few weeks left. She's been ready, and this isn't a sudden shock, both of which I think help. But I've never lost anyone before, and I don't know how I'll process things once she's actually gone.

So, F!S, how do you process your grief? Prayer, rituals? Do funerals help? Visiting gravesites? Something more internal and less formal? I'm not remotely religious and I'm not from a culture that does household shrines, but I find myself preemptively wanting to light candles to her. Which makes no sense.

Call this a general thread about death and grief and related topics.

Re: Mourning

[(Anonymous)]

My condolences OP.

Maybe you should put this under a trigger warning, it's a sensitive topic for people who have lost a loved one.

Re: Mourning

[morieris]

When my grandfather died, I cried once and that was it. It's like remembering him and going "Oh." I don't feel anything about it, which is weird.
I feel worse about my dog, but that only happened six months ago. It just made me more afraid of the unknownness of death when I wasn't really before. So I processed it by making it worse I guess. I'm sorry.

Re: Mourning

[(Anonymous)]

My thoughts and prayers are with you, OP.

If candles is what you feel like doing, then do it. I have a tendency to cry all the tears I would at a funeral beforehand.

While I am religious, the pain is not meant to go away (at least I don't think it does. My grandmother passed over 10 years ago and every now and then I still tear up and miss her fiercely). Some people need time to be on their own, but at some point, it's good to be with people, and maybe have a good cry (unless crying isn't your style) with those people who can share your feelings.

I generally tend to cry, pray, and then light some candles for the person, etc. I also write about it. And sometimes I'll talk about it to someone who knew the person or knows me very well.

Again OP, my thoughts and prayers go out to you and your loved ones (and your grandmother, of course).

Re: Mourning

[tabaqui]

I'm so sorry.

And...this won't help but...everyone does this differently, and you'll have to figure out what works for you. If you feel like lighting a candle - or a whole bank of them - go for it!

I, personally, find funerals repugnant. The corpse looks like a corpse, not the person I loved, everyone is fake-nice and seems to be trying to milk every bit of emotion from every person, and all the Jesus babble (especially when the person wasn't remotely religious) is off-putting.

We had a wake for my dad, *no* funeral, no viewing. At the funeral home (setting up the cremation), we all joked about why couldn't we just float him out in the near-by like and have a 'Viking' funeral. The funeral guy looked a bit taken aback, but that's how my family deals with things. Remembering the dead, telling fun stories, celebrating their life - that worked for us.

And our grief was private, and whatever it involved, it didn't matter, so long as it helped. So just keep in mind - you can't grieve *wrongly*, and don't let anyone guilt you into anything or make you feel bad.

I hope her passing is peaceful, and that you and yours are there to let her know how much she is loved.

Re: Mourning

[dethtoll]

I'm so sorry. It's looking like my grandma might be starting her slow circling of the drain as well. This after my dad died last year, too.

I'm not sure how I'm gonna deal with it. I'm still not sure I'm even dealing with losing dad -- I have a ton of stuff from his house in my living room and I haven't even gone through it yet.

Re: Mourning

[kallanda_lee]

I'm sorry, OP.

The only thing I can advise you, OP, make the best of those last weeks. Before my paternal grandmother died, I went to visit her that last week (even though my parents did not) and I'm so glad I did, because I didnt really with my other grandma and my granddad.

If she's still communicative, ask her questions you always wanted to ask, have her tell a story from her childhood or yours, for that matter. Write it down to read years down the line. Tell her you love her.

If she's not communicative - do still talk to her, for yourself as much as for her.

Make sure that when she leaves this world you have no regrets, you have said what needs to be said.

As for after: allow yourself to mourn. Do what feel right. Many cultures had rituals for mourning, but in modern times we often lost those, and I doubt it is good.

I used to burn candles in church for my grandma, even though i'm not religious, but she was, and it seemed meaningful.

Funerals do not really help, imho, but they are a good thing to go to in terms of closure as well.

There is no right way to mourn, op. You can mke a ritual of your own. You can burn candles. You can buy her favourite chocolate and eat it. Do what feels right, and screw whoever is judgmental.

Re: Mourning

[herpymcderp]

We held a wake after my dad died. It was a nice, sunny day. We drank champagne and people shared their favorite memories of him. I was kind of too fucked up at the time to want to be part of it, but I did appreciate that it wasn't a funeral.

Later on, I got high with my brother and mom (the only time we've purposefully smoked pot as a family) and we just sat with each other and everyone absorbed our sorrow and loss silently. That was what really helped most.

politics

[(Anonymous)]

question below

Best TV/anime/whatever openings

[(Anonymous)]

What shows have the best opening? Either the song is really great and you never fast-forward through it, or the visuals are so cool and fitting for the show?

Meteorologists predict a big TWD shipping shit storm

[(Anonymous)]

****** Minor spoilers for next episode below *******

What do you hate-watch?

[(Anonymous)]

Or hate-read?

What secrets have you kept

[(Anonymous)]

from your SO?

Fancast--Give me yours!

[(Anonymous)]

What's your ideal fancast, be it for a movie, video game, book, anime, manga, t.v. show---List it here!

Or if you're looking for one, request it here!


My request: Fancast for Sirius Black and Remus Lupin? Much appreciated, FS!

Neat puzzle game

[(Anonymous)]

Found on Reddit. Great time waster. You're welcome. (I'm sorry.)

http://ocuspuzzle.com/

For those of you who like H/C...

[(Anonymous)]

What exactly do you like about it? I mean in terms of setting, situation, how the characters react and interact etc.

For example, do you like fic where one character ends up in hospital, and it's very psychical h/c? Or maybe much more psychological where one is a war vet, for example?

Tell me our likes!

Old books

[(Anonymous)]

So I'm moving and I've got some boxes of books. Most of them are kids/YA and I don't think I have room for them. But I'm poor in a lot of respects and I hate to get rid of things. Especially books, which I know is silly even if the chance of rereading most of them is low. I should probably give them to charity or a secondhand store. Can anybody give me advice or make me feel better about this?

Tumblr Rant (mentions of sex & sexuality)

[(Anonymous)]

I'm a cis lesbian, and I don't like dick. On tumblr, this apparently makes me an awful transmisogynist and twef (trans women exclusionary feminist). There are lots of posts by SJ tumblr that talk about having a genital preference makes you awful, and they're hardly every aimed at straight women, gay men, or straight men. It's ALWAYS aimed at lesbians.

It just really rubs me the wrong way. I can understand trans women on tumblr getting defensive because there are a lot of transmisogynistic radical feminists on tumblr, but I don't think attacking people's personal sexual boundaries is the right way to go about it.

Whenever I see these posts that make me out to be a terrible person, I always feel guilty. It's not like I'm one of those lesbians who goes around talking about how gross penises are all the time. In fact, I don't really find them gross. I just...can't have the kind of sex I want to if someone has a penis, and sex is important to me in a relationship.

Also, I'm not an abuse survivor, but I've even seen posts that say things like a lesbian being raped by a man or dealing and dealing with sexual trauma still isn't an excuse for being put off by penises, and this attitude sickens me.

On tumblr, I feel like if you argue with trans women on any point, you get mercilessly attacked, and I really hate this pervasive attitude. :/

Fandom Stuff

[(Anonymous)]

General fandom thread.

General Questions

[(Anonymous)]

Post any questions, with the topic in the subject line.

What do you think of chrissy teigen

[(Anonymous)]

And her selecting the gender of her child?

[fscom]

Games thread!