fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2169 ]

[ SECRET POST #2169 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2169 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 078 secrets from Secret Submission Post #310.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Who said it and how did you deal with it?

I got an enormous FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!! once, which I thought was very mature.

Weirdly, I find it refreshing when people say something mean to me. It doesn't happen very often (can't even think of an example rn), and when it does often there's at least a grain of truth to what they're saying. So actually, I take it as a tip, normally.

Oh, specifying that I'm talking about RL here. I don't think the internet counts for me.

I recently had someone tell me that I didn't have a good attitude, wasn't a good listener, and wasn't fit for my line of work via email. I tried to set them straight and reply, then realized that that person was the type that had to get in the last word in a conversation....so unfortunately I had to be the bigger person and not respond at all. :/

What a jerk. D:

My mother once told me she wished I'd been abducted by aliens.

We don't talk anymore.

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

diet_poison - 2012-12-11 03:49 (UTC) - Expand

I was suicidally perfectionist and someone accused me of thinking I was perfect. I nearly took my throat out yelling back at them and I actually attempted to kill myself later that night.

Someone once told me they hoped my boyfriend would smack me in the face regularly whenever I mouthed off.

They said this in response to me posting a somewhat rude "*gigglesnort*" on a batshit bananas "Bryke ruined X perfect headcanon for meeeeeee!" comment in a Kataang vs Zutara bitchfight shortly after the ATLA finale.

I lol'd. :D

People in real life are always nice to me. Probably more because I'm nonconfrontational offline than because they're all coincidentally nice though...

Not really one thing, but my dad gets to me by saying that I'm annoying (like if I walk past him, somehow I MUST be doing it to annoy him) and by saying that when I'm upset, I'm pretending to be to make him look bad (even if I'm trying desperately not to look upset). It makes me feel like a shitty person in general.

I also had two random strangers in one week yell to me that I looked fat or "out of shape." I'm not even that fat (not that it would be okay to say that stuff to someone who was).

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 01:02 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 01:56 (UTC) - Expand

At one of my old jobs, I traveled around to different offices with a few coworkers to do work for town offices (this was with an auditing firm.) At one town we went to, we had our work cut out for us because this office was ridiculously low-tech and not run very well. All the ledgers were paper, not on soft copy, and some was even hand-written. We were there for three days, and on the second day we were there, long enough to be cranky but not long enough to be finished, we were there until well past five. I was an intern at the time, and so sometimes got the less glamorous jobs - like photocopying their backwardass paperwork because they didn't have it electronically.

I'm standing there, daydreaming while I photocopy this stack and one of the office employees walks by and sneers, "So, this is what your parents paid for you to go to college for?"

Really? Insulting some kid who's at least thirty years younger than you for doing the gruntwork every new kid has to do?

We stayed that night until past seven, me fuming in frustration the whole time. Every time someone mentions the town, I scowl.

Edited 2012-12-11 00:55 (UTC)

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

diet_poison - 2012-12-11 03:54 (UTC) - Expand

Someone randomly yelled at me out the window of their car, "Yeah keep walking fatass!" It was weird. I always would walk and I honestly wasn't even fat. Like at most I may have been slightly chubby by anyone's standards. It was kinda funny.

The meanest thing...well, when I was in middle school I was told by a bunch of popular bitches not to sit at *their* table anymore (Small lunch room, I sat where-ever there was a free seat) after I was told to not sit there anymore one of the girls asked if I had a boyfriend. One of her friends giggled and said "Of course she doesn't!" and walked off.

Oh, I had a "friend" tell me once that my breasts were great because they were *big* and if I just lost a lot of weight he'd so *fuck* me. Yeah, did not help I had a huge crush on him at the time. Looking back I have no clue why. :X

Outside the non-specific standard threats of violence/insults/questions of your character you get working some jobs.

Got told by someone fairly close they didn't think I had a sense of empathy, I hadn't ever had genuine feelings for them, and I had a cargo cult approach to relationships.

I dealt with it poorly, because I guess it hit a nerve. It wasn't true, but it was too close to how I occasionally came off to strike a chord to certain insecurities.

Probably the multiple times people told me to kill myself or when my siblings would tell me to go sit in the road and wait for a truck to come by.

Honestly though it's not so much the meanness but the repetitiveness of insults that stuck with me. The "fat" "ugly" "stupid" "worthless" that would be thrown at me from multiple sources growing up.

Mostly when people would throw insults my way I just ignored them. I'm a pretty shy quite person, not really one to speak up or talk back.

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

silverau - 2012-12-11 01:42 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

diet_poison - 2012-12-11 03:56 (UTC) - Expand

Well. It was election season, roommate and I were making generalized jokes about both parties, and I guess one of mine was awful and struck a nerve because she basically said "I thought you were better than that", stormed off, and I was extremely upset/crying for the next two days.

We're cool now. Just one of those situations where absolutely everything comes to a head at once. Unfortunately I've got the thing where I'll remember everything awful I've ever done for years and years down the road and 'replay' them to myself when I'm in a bad place.

My mother told me she loved me but didn't like me. I don't think a parent should ever tell that to their child, but if they must, at least do it when they're grown. I was only about 11 when she said it to me and I've kept her at an emotional distance ever since. I love the rest of my family too much to break my ties to her since I would be breaking my ties with them, too, so things have actually gotten worse between us in the 20+ years since. I secretly can't wait until she dies even though I know it will break everyone else in my family's hearts when she does.

Two things stand out as meanest. When I was eight, my dad told me I was selfish and only cared about myself. That hurt a lot but I didn't really do anything about it because whenever I tried to talk things out with him it would make things worse.

More recently, some random stranger on a Facebook page told me I was so ugly I should kill myself. It stung a bit but I tried to just laugh it off because... it's the internet.

Probably not the meanest thing someone has ever said to me, but it kind of stuck in my head.

I asked this girl I didn't know if I could take the seat next to her on the school bus (not my fault there weren't any free double seats left) and she just said, in this really nasty tone "can't you see I'm trying to eat?!"

I was just so flabberghasted that I walked on and sat down next to somebody else.

There's this chick who tells me every single day of my life that I'm too fat to be allowed. Most days she tells me at least once that it would be awesome if I died. (Not suicide though, cause that would make me an attention-seeker.)

She says that cause I'm ugly I'm never going to be important to anyone, and how it's really embarrassing that people probably think I don't know that I'm meant to be an extra. When I dress down she says I shouldn't go out in public looking that ugly. When I dress up she says it's mortifying because people might pity the pig who thinks she can hide how hideous she is behind some eyeshadow.

She says the summer I lost twenty-five pounds by restricting to 200 calories a day and puking up as much of that as I could was my greatest ever achievement, and I'm a failure for not having kept it up. (She doesn't rate any of my professional qualifications or PhD, cause other people manage those things without being whale-mutants.)

I really hate that stupid fat bitch.

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 01:59 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

diet_poison - 2012-12-11 04:01 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 04:51 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 06:57 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 08:33 (UTC) - Expand

I was trying to narrow it done to one and when I realized I couldn't even decide a top ten it made me so upset I've decided to nominate your post as the meanest thing anyone has ever said to me. Oh look, you won. Congratulations.

I'm going to deal with this by harrassing my sister and listening to my Pansy Division/standup Pandora channel while cleaning the kitchen.

It's kind of hard to pick a single "meanest thing". I mean, people have always said mean shit to me, are continuing to say mean shit to me, and will always say mean shit to me. So to some extent it all just blurs into a big pile of "people are frequently assholes".

The ones I react badly to are generally some variation on YOU HAVE NO HEART/SOUL or YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ANYONE OR ANYTHING. Generally because I actually care way too much about just about everything and everyone I know.

I generally "deal" with it by getting REALLY FUCKING DEPRESSED. Hooray~

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 02:01 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

manifold - 2012-12-11 02:14 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:05 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

diet_poison - 2012-12-11 04:10 (UTC) - Expand

Someone once said, in all seriousness and to my face, that they were concerned when I expressed a passing interest in learning to use a gun for self defense (when it was suggested to me by someone else in the room) because they thought I looked like the type to walk into a school and shoot it up. Even though we didn't know eachother really well, it was well enough that they should've known that I'm the sort that tears up at the idea of hurting ANYTHING. I haven't spoken to them since.

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:06 (UTC) - Expand

Uhhh. Are you or are you not counting slurs? :/

I don't react well to getting them IRL. I punched a guy in the nose once for calling me a faggot. (Hi! I have anger issues!) This was not the smartest decision since it was at school and earned me a suspension when I broke his nose.

Fortunately since then I've learned to deal with it in other ways, but it still always makes me mad.

'-people from country X- are worse than cannibals!'

Oh, and my mother saying 'I never wanted to be your mother! I wish you had never been born!' Lovely day she said that.

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:09 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:29 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 04:23 (UTC) - Expand

(tw: suicide)

My best friend was trying to make me feel shitty about saying I would call the police if she threatened to kill herself again. She told me, "Well, you have no problem looking the other way for (mutual acquaintance) and (other mutual acquaintance)!"

I haven't been friends with either of these people for half as long as she and I have been friends. I don't know them well at all. Not to mention, they're not suicide risks. But I can't stand being accused of not caring about people (probably because I'm scared that I am a selfish person) and it was the cruellest thing she could have said. I told her to go fuck herself and then I went and got ice cream and ate it.

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:12 (UTC) - Expand

Re: What was the meanest thing someone has ever said to you, FS?

(Anonymous) - 2012-12-11 03:53 (UTC) - Expand

I can't pick a single one. I was a fat kid so people not treating me like shit actually surprised me. From random people I never saw before, teachers, adults, even friends. To make things worse I couldn't control my crying at first. Later I tried to make it look like I was ignoring it but the only difference was that I would cry later when no one could see. Sometimes just me standing on a bus stop would make people look at me with disgust.

Nowadays I'm not fat anymore but whenever someone looks at me I can't help but think they think I'm disgusting or are about to make a mean comment. Especially if they look nice and confident.