[ SECRET POST #4354 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4354 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 31 secrets from Secret Submission Post #623.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

General comments:

(If the thread contains spoilery/triggery content please warn/post as 2nd comment so it collapses!
Please collapse images, too!)

Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[(Anonymous)]

And do you like them as people, as in, if they weren't your parents, do you think you'd be friends with them?

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[(Anonymous)]

Yes and yes. We don't share all the same views but they're both reasonable and respectful people. All of us have friends we don't share views with, so that wouldn't be an issue.

As for how they are as parents: they love me and all of their children unconditionally. Their biggest dream in life is that we are happy. They taught us everything they could think of to give us the means to take care of ourselves, to succeed in life, to do whatever we want, to be whoever we want. I couldn't have asked for better.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[kaijinscendre]

I was raised by my father. Growing up, I thought he was an amazing dad. Now, I think he was more of an amazing friend and an okay dad.

My mom was very hands off but good. She just doesn't have the personality for kids. Once we got 13+ she was much better at handling us.

I think I'd be friends with them.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[(Anonymous)]

My parents were terrible parents. My mom suffered from unmedicated bipolar and postpartum for my entire childhood, and, while neither of those things are her fault, she was abusive and acted so strangely at times that it was terrifying. My father is an abuser and bully who was physically and emotionally battering our entire lives. He used to tell me I was trash that no one would ever love and would physically carry me outside and put me with the garbage because that was 'where I belonged'.

My mom is one of my best friends today but my relationship with my father is non-existent and I'm happy about that.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[(Anonymous)]

No and no. My parents played favorites with my sibling and I to the point where I'd figured it out by age 6. My father was the good guy and forced my mom to be the disciplinarian all the time, and we as kids resented her for that, which totally wasn't fair to her. And for all their claims of being good liberals, my parents were two of the most classist, racist, sexist people I've ever known. I don't hate them, but I've got no use for either of them. My father is dead and I miss him, but I haven't spoken to my mother in over a year and her example of motherhood is a main reason why I chose never to have children myself.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[(Anonymous)]

As an adult, I've come to realise that my mom is probably the best, compared to the mothers of the kids I went to school with. She is wise and she is kind, she's not afraid to speak her mind and she very rarely judges situations wrongly. Very little advice that she's given me has turned out wrong. She's one of my best friends, and truly a good person.

My stepdad is nice, and unquestionably loves all the kids. His parenting has been good, though he's had his moments. Like how he insisted that my brother was "a great talent at the piano" when he was mangling classical pieces with his lack of fine motor skills and musical intuition. He always was kinda preoccupied with The Son, but I don't think he ever saw that himself. He'd certainly deny it if anyone were to accuse him of ignoring his daughters!

My dad is very, very nice, to the point where he is honestly kind of a doormat. He's always helping people - including me and my half-brother there, but his inability to say "no" also means that twenty years after they parted ways, he's still having to deal with my other brother's crazy mom. I also think his conflict avoidance was part of why it took him so long to truly confront the crazy mom about the way she was treating me (to his defense: this was in the nineties, when "emotional abuse" wasn't a thing). He broke it off with her becaues she made him choose between her and me, and given the exhausting story about visitations rights and custody battles that followed, it is probably the greatest sacrifice anyone has ever made for my sake.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[tabaqui]

Yeah, I think they really were. I loved - love - them to pieces, enjoyed hanging out with them, and was always so proud of them and in awe of them.

I had a good childhood and a good relationship with my parents, and miss my dad (he passed about ten years ago) and my mom (she lives in another state with my sister) every single day.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[morieris]

I made it this far being raised by an alcoholic and a parent.

Bit overbearing, I'd probably be farther along in life if they weren't.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[philstar22]

I don't know. Honest. They were good in some ways, but really bad in others. And I have a hard time telling. But no, I wouldn't be friends with them if they weren't my parents. I don't have too many conservative friends.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[(Anonymous)]

My dad was a bad parent in a lot of ways and I doubt I would’ve been friends with him, but he wasn’t a total monster. My mom was a good parent in a lot of ways and fucked up badly in others, and I probably would’ve been friends with her. I mostly was friends with her. But she was an addict, mostly of alcohol, her whole life, and my dad became a drug addict and terrifying to be around in the last few years of his life. But neither of them was a bad person. They spent a lot of time and energy helping people.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[nightscale]

Yeah, they were good. Honestly looking back I really am grateful for how good my home life was growing up, I don't think I'd have done well without that at all.

I partly already consider my dad my friend as well as my father, so yeah I'd certainly get along with him, my mum I like but I think without her being my mother the relationship might be a little more tenuous(we basically have all the same worst aspects as each other so while it's mostly fine when we have blown-up at one another it's never been good).

If I wasn't into nerdy shit however I probably wouldn't be friends with them, but if I was, I think so yeah.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[kallanda_lee]

I love/like them as people. But I don't think they were great parents, per se.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[dani_phantasma]

Yeah I do.

I had issues with them for the years after I graduated and we didn't get each other. I also had untreated Bipolar that made things really difficult as well as I finally worked out with my doctor that I was having flashbacks to my time in school and I didn't realize that was what it was so it was also untreated. Long story short I had a lot going on with me that made it really difficult to see straight, so to speak. And I could be pretty difficult.

They're not perfect obv, and I still have qualms with my father for how he can be about some things. But growing up they were very loving. They tried to address the needs of each of me and my siblings and do their best. And even now they are helpful and there for us. They give me space now since we visited last, and respect my needs and interests. My mom understands more.

*ahem* yeah that was helpful to write so I'm glad to find this topic.

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[soldatsasha]

Sort of, and..... sort of? My parents were/are very complicated people, very much shaped by their experiences with the communist party. I don't think it would be possible to be friends with them, even if someone wanted to.

As for whether they were good parents... For most of my childhood I was very independent from their influence. I think they prepared me for what I'd face in life, but I'm not sure if a parent deserves credit for being absent to the point their kid develops self-sufficiency?

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[(Anonymous)]

well, my parents divorced when i was eight, so...

my mum; on the one hand she was a single mum trying to work a job and raise two kids who spent forever struggling in the face of adversity, and i respect her efforts and achievement on those grounds (even if it did mean virtually abandoning the two of us to more or less our own devices for at least three years)... but ultimately i almost think she was somebody who was beaten down by it eventually, especially with regard to her subsequent choice of partner, and i think i'd respect her even more if she'd come out stronger for it all than weaker

friends? no chance - except for biology, we have literally nothing in common; there's no shared interests or experiences, no real level on which we can communicate, nothing more than "hi, how's work, how's the other side of the planet (she emigrated a few years back, which is a story in itself), okay i'll speak to you again in another ten years" after which nothing will have changed

my dad; i love him dearly, but i've seen the way he's dealt with other kids; his own by his next partner, her previous kids, the kids of his next partner after that, the kids they subsequently adopted... and honestly, he's not that great at parenting - he's got me and my sister pushing 40, and my half brother pushing 30, and there's numerous other kids, and somehow he's managed to never spend much time dealing with any of us through the ages of about 12 through 17, and on the few occasions that he has it's never ended well; on top of that he's also looking to have his own bit of breathing space, particularly as he gets older, and dealing with kids isn't something he's enjoying or wanting to do

but friends-wise, we get on great; pretty much the exact opposite of my mother in that we can talk into the small hours about everything and nothing, we've got shared interests, shared ideas, things in common, things we can actually have fun with and talk about

Re: Just curious... do you think your parents were/are good parents?

[greghousesgf]

I think they were good parents but they don't really "get" me; I have Asperger's and in many ways I'm very, very different from them personality-wise.

Secrets You're Too Lazy to Make

[(Anonymous)]

Side note, whoever us doing it, you're awesome and under appreciated.
I desperately want to find an anime with a plus size girl as the main character. No, not one of those stories like Wallflower or Princess Jellyfish where she has to transform to be pretty
I just want a plus size anime protag.
Is that too hard? Is there any - I haven't found any

Yes Or No Question

[(Anonymous)]

Are you, or are you not, about that life

What music are you loving right now?

[(Anonymous)]

♪ ♩ ♪ ♩ ♪ ♩

What are the most evil movie villains?

[(Anonymous)]

Not suave or fun but actually despicable.

What movie/game/tv trends are you sick of?

[(Anonymous)]

^^^^^

What movie/tv/game trends do you love?

[(Anonymous)]

^^^^^

Dear Santa, for Christmas I would like...

[(Anonymous)]

What do you want for Christmas? What do you think you’ll get? If you don’t celebrate Christmas, what’s on your wishlist?

Does anyone have some guides or know some books that help you learn how to critique things better?

[kaijinscendre]

One of the podcasts I listen to are having weekly events where you listen to the old episodes and talk about the stories. I am TERRIBLE at this and would like to get better at it beyond 1-3 sentences that amount to "This is good."

Any recs or advice welcome.