[ SECRET POST #1563 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1563 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 058 secrets from Secret Submission Post #223.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom.livejournal.com]

05. http://i53.tinypic.com/aym68o.png

[(Anonymous)]

this. "socially awkward" does not mean "it's totally not my fault because i a CONDITION," it means you are just weird.

OK, What

[comradenemesis.livejournal.com]

Seriously, there are are people that do this? I have Aspergers, but don't try to be an asshole, much less use the disorder as an excuse.

[(Anonymous)]

LMAO at all the butthurt pretend internet-diagnosed Asspies who will pop in to say "you just don't understand me"

People who actually have this condition are people like Zev on Amazing Race. Not being able to make friends or being shunned continuously could mean you are selfish, odd, self-absorbed, or just weird. In short, it's your fault. It doesn't mean you get to say it's because you have a ~problem~ so everyone else should be ~super patient~ with your annoying ass.

[ceylon-tae.livejournal.com]

...Freaking signed. You don't stop at the recognition of a problem, whatever you think the source may be. You work on it.

[(Anonymous)]

That pisses me off too. Sadly, AS is not the only diagnosis people use as an excuse to act out. All too often people will use a (more often self diagnosed) disorder as an excuse to act a certain way instead of using that diagnosis to try and help find specific ways to cope and deal.

A diagnosis is not an excuse, it's a tool meant to be used to help you improve your life.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh God yes! This so much!

Or even worse "Well I have ADD!" No....no you don't. Just because you are hyped up on pixie sticks does not mean you are ADD!

[dodgerofzion.livejournal.com]

I love you, anon. From an Aspie to you, here, have this puppy.

[(Anonymous)]

You know I do not think I've ever seen, heard, or read, a claim of Aspergers that could not be replaced with "I'm a flaming asshole who enjoys being a fuckwit and will make no attempt to change or even try to fit in. You little people must all change for me, do you not know how superior we are to you really".

I realise that is a bit wordy, but it is the absolute truth.

The symptoms and diagnosis of Aspergers are exactly the same as Self-Important Asshole.

Help, please...

[(Anonymous)]

I, um... I have always felt uncomfortable about AS.

There are some people I know at my university (both male and female) who could pass for neuro-typical, but who occasionally make asses of themselves in class discussions and dorm hallway meetings. I complained about this behavior once to a friend, and she said that the professors and RAs excuse their behavior because they've been diagnosed with AS. In other words, I was being a jerk for judging them negatively for behavior they couldn't control. But still - they were (and still are, on occasion) assholes.

On one hand, it's obviously not the position of the disadvantaged to accommodate the privileged, and the tone argument is never, ever appropriate. On the other hand, it feels condescending to hold someone with low-level AS to a different standard of behavior, especially when their behavior viably causes other people discomfort.

To give a concrete example, why is someone formally diagnosed AS - who is smart enough and otherwise well-adjusted enough to get into college - allowed to call a woman a dumb bitch in class? That just feels wrong to me.

It seems like a sensitive topic, so I've never really discussed it with anyone. I guess this isn't really what the OP is talking about, but this seems like a good opportunity to ask people for advice and reading suggestions. Yay anonymity?

[(Anonymous)]

Oh god yes. And it is just the excuse that changes, in the 90s it was "but I'm an INFP I don't know how to handle people and crowds", in the early '00s it was "but I have ADHD, I don't know how to handle people and crowds", then the last couple of years it has been "but I'm an Aspie, I don't know how to handle people and crowds". Now I see Catherine Zeta Jones checking into therapy, I suspect next year it will be "But I'm Bi-Polar, I don't know how to handle people and crowds".

And funny thing is, all of the people claiming those things are just the same as arogant, ignorant, asses, who are just too lazy to think about others. You hardly ever see ADHD or INFP used as an excuse these days, so Aspies is just the latest fashionable excuse to claim to cover bad behaviour in general.

[blaak-tokage.livejournal.com]

Completely agree! As a diagnosed Aspie I often find people like this somewhat offensive, socially awkward =/= ass-hole.

[(Anonymous)]

I knew a few people like that back in high school. As someone with Social Anxiety Disorder, I've always found them to be overwhelming. I don't mind talking about fandom, but take a deep breath and calm down.

[(Anonymous)]

lets be honest for a moment. Aspergers is a fake condition. it doesn't exist except as a cover and sop for people that are a bit thick and lazy. Make an effort to actually change your behaviour and stop blaming it on something that doesn't exist.

[sashwizzled.livejournal.com]

Man, this. Why can't you just be 'socially awkward and prone to saying stupid shit'? What is wrong with that? (hell, I rock it. The stuff that comes out of my mouth ;_; ) Why do you have to make excuses? (Obviously this is general you)

[lurksinclosets.livejournal.com]

This. This. THIS.

I've met real Aspies. They are usually very sweet people who don't quite 'get' social ques and what may or may not be acceptable in a certain situation. Sometimes you can't even tell and just mark them off as being awkward.

These self-diagnosed 'aspies' are just trying to find an excuse to be annoying and rude. They exist all over the internet and unfortunately, this means they show up at conventions, too. =/ It's like the new 'ADD/ADHD'.

[khandreia.livejournal.com]

Damn right it's offensive...well, at least it is to me as someone who actually was diagnosed by a professional and have had second and third opinions from other doctors agreeing with the diagnosis. Anyone who would try to pull that on me would have another thing coming.

Though of course, it's not just reserved to conventions either. It extends to online and the real world too.

[october-miss.livejournal.com]

I'm kinda starting to wonder whether a lot of people in fandom really DO have aspergers. I mean why should this many people lie? Or am I being overtly naive?
I don't know, I just don't think this many people would just for the heck of it.

...and yes, before anyone asks I have been on the Internet before.

[hikari87.livejournal.com]

Hm, I've not had this happen to me though I've heard of it before. But the only person I ever encountered at a con that I did suspect (and I think I was right) that she had a mild ASD was very sweet and polite.

[mature.livejournal.com]

Holy shit anon, are you me? I actually had a side-rant along these lines in my LJ a few posts back.

[(Anonymous)]

I agree that people shouldn't self diagnose but... I also feel YOU shouldn't diagnose other people.

Unless someone straight out says, "I self diagnosed" how do you know? I know it happens, but these kind of discussions make me all sorts of uncomfortable because it just brings out the people who don't believe a mental disease is real or think they are allowed to diagnose other.

Don't let anyone be an asshole to you, but be kind back WHATEVER their condition, I guess that would be my advice.

[leafing.livejournal.com]

Some of the comments to this secret got this song stuck in my head.

[uncieloazul.livejournal.com]

Agreeing so hard. a mental issue =/= an excuse for being an asshole.

The one person with AS i know is actually the sweetest, kindest, most selfless being in the whole planet. and never uses AS as an excuse for anything.

[velvet-mace.livejournal.com]

God yes. Because they use aspergers like it's an excuse for bad behavior. As if having it means you can't learn social graces.

Putting your foot occasionally in your mouth because you are oblivious isn't the same as not caring if you hurt other peoples feelings. Someone calls you out on your behavior, you say "sorry, I didn't mean it, I have aspergers and I don't realize sometimes I've hurt people. Please tell me what I've done so I can learn not to do it again." Not "I have aspergers, therefore it's okay that I'm rude."