[ SECRET POST #2192 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2192 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Tales of the Abyss]


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[Merlin, RPS]


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[Lilo & Stitch]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 032 secrets from Secret Submission Post #313.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

05. http://i.imgur.com/k8nWl.png

[(Anonymous)]

It's EXHAUSTING to do that all the time. I had a party for NYE and I'm still recovering. My max is one party per month, sheesh.

Extroverts, man. Can't live with 'em... and they won't let you live without them.

[morieris]

Who parties on Christmas? That's like the perfect time to stay at home.

[(Anonymous)]

I hear ya.

One time, my classmates managed to get me to go out with them once a week for a month straight.

That was enough "living it up" to last me a year, no exaggeration.

I liked them and it was fun and all was it was exhausting. Even if I hadn't been attending school on top of that, I don't think I could maintain that rhythm.

People are tiring. Like, even my BFFs? I don't think I could stand partying or whatever with them once a week. I would beg them for a vacation after a month or two.

[(Anonymous)]

Friends don't let friends drink and scuba dive.

[deadtree]

yeah, my friends and coworkers bug me about it too :\ And when I DO go out with them, they're like "Woooow, what made you decide to come out of your cave? Is the sun hurting your eyes?" and I kinda want to be like fuck you I'm going home :v

[(Anonymous)]

I relate to this secret so much! You are not alone OP.

[(Anonymous)]

I HATE the idea that people on the internet aren't real. It excuses anonymous cruelty AND belittles the wonderful relationships people can have with anyone regardless of physical distance.

[rosehiptea]

I really don't see people outside of work except for my son, and I stay home a lot. For me it's having some negative effects, but not everybody feels that way at all. And even if I had more social opportunities, I'd still be a person who stays home a lot.

[pelespen]

*gets out the old lady cane*

You would think that after 20+ years of internet, we'd have gotten away from this whole, 'people-on-the-internet-aren't-real-friends' b.s. Also, ain' nothin' wrong with being an introvert. NOTHING wrong with it.

Goddamned obnoxious, pushy extroverts. GET OFFA MAH LAWN.

Seriously, though, OP, eventually you'll probably just stop giving a shit about that stupid attitude, and maybe get used to politely telling people like that to fuck off.

[childings.livejournal.com]

GEEZ can someone PLEASE make this point about fandom being a valid "real life" activity WITHOUT shitting all over people who choose to party or have other interests JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

YOU'RE NOT HELPING

And for the record, I'm an introvert but that doesn't mean I avoid parties and social events and going outside, being introverted =/= a shut-in, I have friends and I can enjoy myself at a party, I just don't do it all the time and I feel a bit exhausted afterward, doesn't mean I don't have a good time

[(Anonymous)]

My answer to the whole "come out and party" thing is generally, "I hate being around drunks. They aren't funny, they can't dance, and they smell bad." And now I have a lot of friends who don't drink (or don't drink much) and when we have a good time, we all have a good time.

[(Anonymous)]

The people I'm friends with on the internet are better friends to me than the people I'm friends with in "real life". I have more in common with them, I spend more time communicating with them and I'm far more likely to go to them for advice.

Whose not real?

[kallanda_lee]

I suppose I'd be worried if I had a friend or relative who was spending Christmas alone.

Not that I don't believe that you're fine with that...it's just that a lot of people aren't, but wouldn't want to burden people by saying so - so it's hard to tell the difference.
Christmas has always been an important in my family, and we've had "strays" coming over before to celebrate with us.

As for the rest, it's perfectly okay to not like partying, or scuba diving or whatever. Not all people enjoy outdoor activities, or being in large crowds.

[(Anonymous)]

though i agree with all you say OP, adn it is also my preferred way of living, but for our own development we do need to have a balance between online and RL...relationships develop differently IRL and whether we like it or not, that is where we actually have to live and get along...just make sure you are not being stunted in any way by your online life

we can keep it separate, but one cannot replace the other

[darth_eldritch]

So agree. Partying all the time and being with other people for the sake of being with other people is so empty.

Like others are saying, it's very tiring. And what do you get out of it? At least with fandoms, you can practice writing, art, crafts, whatever you enjoy, and that lasts. As well as meaningful conversation with others who enjoy the same.

Here's some advice

[chardmonster]

from somebody who spent a great deal of her teenage years like this.

I was deeply, profoundly lonely, but if anyone cornered me and asked me I might've said what you just did. I had people who imed me, sure. And I always ate lunch alone and had no physical contact with other humans except my parents giving me hugs. Nobody outside my family noticed if I was sick. Nobody actually cared very much about my feelings outside my family. But people on the internet sure wanted to talk about that MUD we played!

I had "friends" who existed in an electronic box and found it very easy to drop contact with me because, well, I was just a line of text and we are human beings made of meat who are built for the physical world. Please make more friends you see in person. And go hang out with them. You're going to be happier. People might be pointing out your lack of physical social life because it's showing. A "social life" doesn't necessarily mean partying. It can very well mean just eating lunch with somebody.

[unicornherds]

I've always been very happy that I grew up in a family of introverts. Mostly it was never seen as strange or odd that I preferred to stay in rather than party it up all weekend.

[cassandraoftroy]

While I certainly don't judge people who do enjoy it, I've never understood the appeal of drinking and partying. Like genuinely, I don't get why it's fun. It's not that I don't like spending time with friends or socializing, but booze and loud music isn't my idea of an interesting social event. I prefer the "cake and games" kind of party, where you can talk to people and do fun things.

[(Anonymous)]

i am a loser with no life

i am like this close to having a break down

and i can't find a therapist that's right for me, not to mention all the time you have to wait to get an initial appointment

sometimes i can tell myself i'm happy with just being online and having my hobbies

but it's just little lies to try to get through the down time, it feels like the bare minimum for survival

because online people are fine and all but it doesn't replace human contact

it doesn't replace going out and sharing an experience with people

i have an internet connection and can talk to people located all over the world but i'm so isolated

[(Anonymous)]

I think a lot of people are reading a lot more into this secret than is being said. Some people are treating it here like the OP has no friends at all safe for online ones. Except... they even say they have RL friends. They have hobbies and interests and stuff. And it kinda sounds like most of their hobbies are the indoor kind.

All they are saying is that they are sick of people assuming they need drinking, partying and outdoor hobbies to have fun.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm just LOLing at the mental image of people being really worried that you aren't going scuba diving enough.

[citrinesunset]

Partying isn't for everyone, and that's fine.

As an introvert, I find them tiring. And they're overwhelming. I love getting together with people in small groups, or one-on-one, but large parties always make me feel awkward and frustrated.

People who don't understand that different activities appeal to different people are obnoxious.

[tabaqui]

I absolutely despise the notion that you can't 'enjoy' yourself unless you're out with masses of people getting drunk.

Hell friggin' no.

[(Anonymous)]

There's nothing wrong with not liking to party and things like that. But when you have no tactile relationships and interactions with people who aren't online... it can be a problem.

I've noticed this culture that seems to be growing over the past years, of people who prefer to only have online interactions. But then because they only know how to interact through a keyboard and not face to face, they just can't... thrive.

There's so many people online who just prefer to stay home, mooch off of whatever parents/relatives/friends that they may be living with, that they can't live a proper life where they fend for themselves. They can't interact with people properly so they get all sorts of anxiety, and it prevents them from getting jobs and being able to become independent people.

Having internet friends is fine and all, but you do need that balance of online/IRL realtionships as well.